Losing a loved one is very hard and I experienced it for the first time when I was 14. My brother was only 16 when he passed away it was the first time I experienced the loss of someone close. Now years later that same wound has reopened. I recently lost one of my younger sister's who passed away last Friday. I was pretty upset with the way the media portrayed my sister's death. Especially Nbc Chicago *insert eye roll here* which was one of the first media outlets to break the story. Some of the headlines I read were distasteful and some of the articles left the readers to speculate what may have happened to her since it happened in public. To clear things up she actually passed away from a blood clot; she happened to collapse shortly after getting off of the train on her way to work. She had surgery a week prior to remove the blood clots in her lungs and we all thought the surgery was a success. She had been released from the hospital and was back to her normal self, so her death really shocked everyone. I'll always remember the amazing memories we shared. She was so bubbly and such a hard worker, I'd like to say she got her ambition from me haha! My personal email I made when I was 14 also has our initials so she's always with me!
Life always has it's ups and down but I try not to dwell on the sad parts in life because the loss of a loved one is hard, and difficult to come out of. The difficult thing about dealing with loss is realizing that world doesn't stop and life still goes on. The first day I found out about my sister's death I was being such bum but the next day I still had castings to attend, I still had to go to work to pay my bills and it sucks because when you're going through something this personal you just wish you could put life on hold while you get yourself together. So here a few of my tips that have helped (and are helping) me get through life one day at a time. I hope they'll help you.
1. Delete your social media apps.
Social media is my biggest distraction. It's crazy I check Facebook before I brush my teeth in the morning ha! Its hard being away from social media as a blogger because it's our job. Since becoming more business oriented, I try to keep parts of my personal life private and off of social media. You know the saying, don't mix business with personal matters. I've been very hesitant on even writing this blogpost but I hope it helps someone. Sometimes taking a break from social media helps you balance out other things in your life. It gives you time to focus on yourself and other things and in the end you'll feel much better afterwards.
2. Icecream! Icecream! Icecream!
This may be the worst tip and not be the healthiest but if you're a foodie like myself then it would be no problem. I've eaten more than 3 cartons of ice cream in one day, but I love food so I don't feel bad when my stomach is so full. I'll just drink lots of water and go walking so I don't feel as bad. If you don't like ice cream maybe cake? Point being, let yourself indulge for a bit and enjoy a good meal.
3.Prayer/ reading the bible, meditation, spirituality -
Most people wouldn't know that I come from a really strong religious background. Religion is also one of those things I just don't discuss on social media but reading the bible and praying is another great way of comfort. Prayer, Yoga and/or other forms of meditation are great ways of getting peace and clarity.
4. Being with Loved Ones-
Even though most of my family in friends aren't in Los Angeles where I currently live, I am constantly getting calls and text from people checking to see how I am doing. During these last couple of days people have asked how I may be holding up. Knowing there are people that care is important. Be sure you surround yourself with people who genuinely care for your well being when you're ready.
5. Soul Searching Vacation-
I remember I was going through one of the toughest moments of my life, I just turned 20 and new to LA with no friends or family here and other personal issues going on. I've always heard of people going on soul searching vacations I got really inspired by the book Eat, Pray, Love. I got a pretty good job opportunity in France which was the perfect getaway for me and a spiritual cleanse. Not only did the time in France refresh me but I also learned a new language, the people and culture but most importantly I learned so much about myself. Sometimes you need to get away from everyone and just "detox". Trust me, you will definitely feel renewed afterwards.
6. Hitting the Gym, Exercise-
Studies actually show that physical exercise releases endorphins in the body which can help with stress and anxiety.
Usually when I'm stressed out I like to hit the gym I tend to focus more early in the morning or late at night which seems to be more peaceful and calm. I also don't have to worry about someone watching me. Since I'm not in the gym everyday the gym pain surely distracts whatever I'm going through at the moment.
I have to say this is the best way to just get your emotions out. It's okay, let it out. The more you hold it in the worse you will feel. It's part of the healing process
Do what works for you, but remember: it's okay to not feel okay!
If you have any tips feel feel to share on the blog or chat with me on my other pages.
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Photo Cred Aimee Song